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Sunday, 16 May 2010

The Made-Up Movie They Tried To BAN!

EDIT: In somewhat predictable fashion, there have been a couple of comments elsewhere speculating that the big guy in the background is supposed to be the Prophet Mohammed. He isn't.

But the Stegosaurus right at the back is Jesus.
 
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Good evening. Welcome. Can I pour you a drink?

An excellent choice, madam. Please, sit down.

Perhaps you are acquainted with the CGSociety website? And with the regular competitions they hold? Well, it was just such a competition that caught my eye one cold afternoon. A 'B-Movie' challenge, no less. Something one might conclude would be ideal for an artist such as myself with an interest in the seamier side of celluloid.

And so I began work on a piece, based on an original teabreak I had enjoyed with some esteemed colleagues. I foolishly dreamt that I might defeat all-comers and seize the contest for myself.

But it was not to be. The moderators decided that my piece was just too intelligent and politically insightful to be allowed in the competition.

So now it is complete, it falls to me to unveil this work here, in my own humble corner of the internet...

(click to enlarge)

And here are some detail shots, for the detail-minded amongst you:


100 comments:

  1. GENIUS
    It came out better than I ever imagined. Well done that man, you've done us proud!
    I especially like your sexy Eastern lady who's being saved by the hero & the Raptor driving the jeep :D

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  2. that is just pure genius. actually had me literally laughing out loud. well done sir!

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  3. Fucking EXCEPTIONAL!!! sooooo good :D

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  4. Best Blog Debut Evar!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I love you mr Evans.

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  5. The more i look at this the more i get caught up in the intelectual richness of it. The Raptor driving a jeep is an act of genius mate.

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  6. This should most definitely be made

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  7. It was...too good for the competition? That's a new one. I hope they make a new competition with higher standards!

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  8. @Dan - jeez, I was being sarcastic... of course it is actually stupid and not politically insightful at all, nevermind 'good' which isn't what I said in the first place.

    It was however deemed, probably fairly, to contravene the 'no politics' rule so could not be entered. I am sure you will like the actual winner much better as there are some fantastic entries in there. Thanks for visiting.

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  9. I would buy a print of this with no hesitation.

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  10. Perhaps the best part is the hero's hand that's on his lady's ass while another hand is shooting a pistol. There are so many classic errors like this in movie posters.

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  11. Can't anyone get Spielberg interested in this production?

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  12. Heterocolor is high quality. I'm glad they went with it.

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  13. I would love to buy a print of this.

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  14. I understand the reasons, people is frightened with this guys very much...
    But it is really good!!

    They can´t post it there , but you do it for your own here, so nice idea.

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  15. Please, please, please make this available for purchase. I would proudly display it next to my print of Jason Chan's "Zombie Playground"

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  16. Holy fuck that is awesome. I want a print.

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  17. I would watch it. Twice. In 3D.

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  18. Oh, that is awesome! Can we please have it in background image/wallpaper sizes? 1680x1050 would be ideal! Thanks! :)

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  19. If you are looking for a place to offer prints, this looks like the kind of thing Topatoco.com would work with you on - they sell lots of... odd... art from cartoonists and folks. No affiliation or anything, just a thought.

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  20. I'd pay to watch this!

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  21. @Jeremy - you win the "spot the deliberate mistake" competition - well done!

    Thanks for the kind words everyone else, glad to have raised a few smiles!

    If people seriously want prints I'll look into it, though I might have to tidy up a few things first, already I'm seeing everything thats wrong with it! Wallpapers on the way...

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  22. I SERIOUSLY would be interested in a poster sized version of this.

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  23. I would pay good money for one of these. Excellent work.

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  24. HOLY SHIT.

    HOLY. SHIT.

    Dan, please contact me via will@bankai.fm, I need some album artwork done. Damn. Damn Dan, damn!.

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  25. I like how the hero has three arms. clearly, while punching and shooting dinosaurs with his first two hands, he realized he needed a third to grab the chick's ass.

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  26. Yes: I would buy a print. Sheer genius. Check boingboing for my movie plot ideas: This movie should be made.

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  27. Yes, prints please! Something this awesome needs to make it into the "Real World" in some form!

    Truly epic.

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  28. Is this a three handed hero? One to punch the dino, another to shoot the gun and a third to grab the girl??? Weird...

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  29. +1 to the "I want a print" chant. Bloody brilliant, so much fun. :D

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  30. I like the sexy wahhabe-wearing lady with the AK on the raptor. She looks as tough as the hero protagonist!

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  31. Highbrow Pictures, indeed!

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  32. If you could actually print this up as a broadsheet, I would buy one in a herartbeat.

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  33. This is awesome! The more I look the more I find!

    Wait- is that a third, disembodied hand on on the heroine's ass? Sweet!!!

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  34. I've always wanted the AKMS paratrooper variant of the AK-47 that the veiled girl's handling.

    This is much more attention to detail than most real movie poster artists even attempt.

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  35. I weep with joy at the glory I behold. Epoch WIN!

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  36. HAHAHAH this is super-rad. GENIUS!

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  37. Ummm, dude the stegosaurus had only one row of those plate-thingys sticking out of its back. This is totally unrealistic.

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  38. seriously this is amazing

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  39. awesome. +1 print for me.

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  40. Well done sir, I too would buy a poster/ print if they were to become available. Genius

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  41. Do want a print. Fucking awesome.

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  42. Wow, I'm overwhelmed! Can't believe it's got so much exposure! Thank you all so much for your comments, it has given me faith that the absurd still has an audience :D

    Will look into prints soonish - wallpapers also soonish but mad busy with 'real' work at the moment so please be patient!

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  43. The velociraptor driving the Jeep made me giggle like a little schoolgirl.

    I would totally hang that in my living room.

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  44. love the hero's third hand. this should soooooo be available as a poster!

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  45. This would make for an amazing poster.

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  46. +1 for the "I want a poster" campaign...

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  47. Dan, I will come and cook you dinner and pay you money for a print. This is just wonderful. I want it for my wall.

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  48. It's great. You got talented.

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  49. I doubt the movie would be anywhere near as good as your poster. Great work.

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  50. This is amazing. Nicely done!

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  51. Amazing, literally the best thing I have seen this year (which might mean I've lived quite a sheltered 2010).

    All jokes aside, that is a genius bit of art work and I too would certainly buy a print.

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  52. Outstanding sir. You have actually brought tears of laughter to my eyes. I can't even remember the last time I enjoyed a work of art this much. I absolutely love your work. Although part of me would love to see the movie, no film could ever do this justice. Please think about selling prints - I would very much like to give you money in exchange for a poster sized copy of this.

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  53. This is Awesome! All I have to say.

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  54. I was just pointed to this! Total awesomeness in concept and execution! I will not rest until this picture is made! Who's with me?

    *giggles*

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  55. Any plans to sell prints?

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  56. I'd like to buy a print too. I have a wall that needs this movie poster.

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  57. A work of pure brilliance! Long live the Talisauruses!

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  58. I think i just pissed myself!

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  59. I'm still chuckling over that raptor driving a jeep.

    Add me to the poster/print/wallpaper chant.

    Serious artistic genius, thanks for sharing it with us

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  60. I just dont even know how to describe my feelings towards this picture...

    I found it in the far corners of the internet aand... it might just be the highlight of my week. I think I'll share it with everyone I know.

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  61. If there were prints available of this ... I think I would cry with excitement ... !

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  62. i must own this on my wall. MUST.

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  63. :P Frak corrections! I say keep the third hand as a character flaw. It would make it easier for you to make the hero sympathetic, with just the kind of angst B movies need!

    I want a print!

    Also, any chance I could ask permission to write a script for this for ScriptFrenzy next year? Hell, I might do it over the summer! This needs to at least begin to be in the real world!

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  64. Send this to Tarantino or Rodriguez, they will git r done!

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  65. its so sad that you even have to post an update like that about the Prophet Whatever

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  66. that would be the best framed picture anyone could ever have in their home.

    ever.

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  67. That’s effin brilliant...

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  68. You are a genius. It goes without saying :]. MAKE THAT MOVIE PLEASE !!!

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  69. @john
    Stegosaurus had two rows... google before you post dude:)

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eUdcrYvhJr8

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  70. Oh and I'm shouting shotgun for the video game rights should this grow into the massive franchise it's destined to become

    Spectacular mate!!!

    :D

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  71. Great picture, it made me laugh. Also don't worry about the Mohammed thing - just send them here instead: http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_QfVWU-2pVL4/Sp2h5vWdbNI/AAAAAAAAIB0/7G1ZwlIMpZ8/s1600/lego-mohammed-faelschung.jpg

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  72. Just made the rounds on our epic stuff of the day at work, pure genius :D Good to see yer fucked sense of humour still going strong man, thirding all those shouts for poster!

    Ronan

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  73. Please make this into a poster. Or send me a link with bigger display resolution. I must have this printed out, framed and hanging on my wall! This is excellent!

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  74. Thanks again everyone, and hi Ronan!

    Prints ARE coming!! The proofs are being done as I type this. If you want to be notified when they're available then subscribe to this comments thread, email me, or just keep an eye on the blog!

    Shouldn't be too long now...

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  75. Am I the only one noticing that the guy has 3 hands, one punching the raptor, one shooting behind the girl, and one holding her butt :3

    Maybe the Hero is genetically modified too.

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  76. This is the most awesome picture I've ever seen!

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  77. I love it. It should be made <3

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  78. Brilliant. I would so watch this movie.

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  79. I keep checking this on a daily basis, hoping and praying that prints will be someday available. :) Can't wait to have this on my wall- absolutely genius!

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  80. Sorry wishingbee and everyone else - the prints really are coming!! Hopefully this week! But I'm new to this game and want to make sure they look as authentic as possible which is proving more difficult and time-consuming than expected.

    The good news is, whilst I've been waiting around I have fixed most of the slightly shit bits in the picture, so your final Talibannosaurus experience will be even better! :)

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  81. Aw, you missed your chance--shoulda been a Golan-Globus production!

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  82. Talibannosaurus prints are now available! Visit myartshame.blogspot.com for more information!

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  83. Hi mate, just checked this out and it's even better than I expected! You've come a long way since Kebabylon (although in some ways no distance at all). Let me know if you make Al-Pirana.

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  84. seen better at http://malevich-art.blogspot.com

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  85. Hey Art, thanks for the comment. The point is taken - I know its not big or clever or saying anything remotely intelligent, but hopefully everything doesn't have to. In contrast, I actually absolutely love your ceramic animals, they're beautiful!

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  86. Top3DModel.com brings you the art of millions of peoples around the world who love 3D Modeling and want to share their master pieces with other,allowing them to view ,download and comment and alot more.
    Top3DModel.com

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  87. Replies
    1. Thanks s-mode, much appreciated!

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  88. That's pretty cool dude. Just realized I was the hundredth comment. Wow.

    ~Randall

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